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Declaration

God grant me serenity to accept the things i cannot change,
the courage to change the things i can,and,
the wisdom to know the difference

In JESUS name,
AMEN

Saturday, September 22, 2007


boring lessons.
i think i shld really go back to NA?
i cant clique wid e ppl in my class.
or am i the only one tat cant fit in?
begining of e yr me n her were close friends but now we aint much of gd friends.
so is e same for majority of e girls in e class.
being 11 girls only?i think
when i 1st came to 3C i knew i was gona change.
to fit in e class.slack n just talk in class..
but now as exams are nearer,
i found myself back and cld no longer stand it.
as i predicted last yr,
it really happen.mayb i shld b more aware of it..
my attitude doesnt fit in e class.
my character dun either.
ppl dislikes me.i know, bloody hypocrites.
i know who hates me n who doesnt.
i know who gossiped abt me n who didnt.
i know who backstabbed me n who didnt.
but wad can i do?nothing.
and i dun wana waste my time either.
Luke 6:27-36
John 15:5
Joshua 1:9
Isaiah 40:31
so now i dun really have any friends,
i'm refering to true friends.
all my good friends are in NA.
i'm really afraid to make friends in exp.
i'm really really scared.
is anyone going through the same thing as me?
the lonliness?
the sadness?
the fear?
the hate?
the unfairness?
the hardship?
i'm not gona do anything but i'm really hurted
i'm really broken inside.
when i flip my bible just now to read e verses i highlighted,
to type out and reflect,
there is a folded page.a dogear.
i flip open the dog ear.
its from isaiah, a chpt of e bible i hvnt read yet.and it states
Then you shall call, and the LORD will answer,
You shall cry, and He will say "Here i am"
Isaiah 58:1
aft i read this verse i brokedown and cried.
i realised i'm hiding too much things.
i'm running away from problems.
i thought i was alrite but i never was.
all these year.these 9years.
now i know i've suffered alot.
even though i thought i let it go alrdy.
but it still dangles in my heart.
i'm mostly always alone.
my true friends are always seperated frm me.
what i wished to come true never did.
- to have happy true friends tat will go thru thick n thin wid me.
- to celebrate my bday wid my friends.
- not to have broken relationships.
i guess all these are part of life.
ppl are out there to break your heart n make you cry.
but its okay. i have God.

once again,every night its tears

12:08 PM