Tuesday, September 12, 2006
NEW RECORD!
1st time i woke up at 4am!haha
SEXY
i thought abt stuff,how things went n all frm 4am-6am.
reflections.hahas.its been along time since i did tat.
Surprisingly i woke up wid a good mood.very good mood.
so werid.but i like it.haha.
prepared and headed 4 skl.
everything seem so different..ok nv really changes.juz how i feel abt going 2 skl.
a "fresh" start.
its amazing how i can even b excited 4 exam.
like " YAY!exams r coming!!" seriously i went nuts 2dae.
mayb cuz i had too much chocolate late nite.haha
hmm..had skl as normal.
only thing i was expectionally noisy 2dae.
the only time i was quiet was only recess^^
cant blame me, i was hungry so i eat instead of talking haha.
aft skl met up wid him as we arranged.
we talked abt some stuff.
hais.missed him so much..
i duno why but when we talk, i juz feel so happy.
i wished tat it didnt end tat early.
i mean i dun hv 2 go off tat early..
den we cld continue chatting..sad..we cant.
he doesnt really needs to explain.
i noe wad happen.roughly.
its ok tat we cant patch.
predicted tat he wld say tat sentence last nite.
more or less i was prepared.
it didnt really hurt, i was prepared 2 let him go untill some1 came along n told us we shld clearify tings out.acttually there aint much tings 2 clearify.
how can u clearify miscommunication?
how can u change the past?
u cant.
stupid mistake i did.makes me regert so badly.
it hurts at 1st.but now e pain has more or less faded.
or mayb its still there all it needs a little poke to it and it'll start all over again.
i realised how important he is 2 me right frm e start of e relationship,
but sadly i didnt noe how 2 keep it.
when he said " do u think i was happy when i said to you that you could find better guys then me. "
i was thinking, if u wasnt happy den y do even said it?
i didnt like it when u said tat either.
hai.things were meant 2 b like this.i wished we had better communication in e past.
aft tis i went 4 chapel practice, was late.
aft chapel met feng n jon 2 go feng hse n do project work.
was playiing wid feng's guit.
feng teached me alittle something new 2 me.haha.
completed our proj work.
headed home.
i'll b slping early.
my study time wld b..
2am-6am.
[ i miss u badly, i understand y we cant patch.There's no need for you 2 explain why you didnt want to patch. You said it before.I understood.the mistake,the decision i decide was stupid.it make me regert so so badly.i just miss being wid you. i wonder if things went differently in the past, wld it still b the same? or something even more? ]
once again,every night its tears
10:30 AM